ONLINE MASTER LIFE & NLP COACH vernon@uk.vernonfroneman.com

NOT FEELING WORTHY?

We are all familiar, with the demands of modern day living – through the media, social channels, television, and perpetual advertising. These all hold an unrealistic bar for us to attain. These demands coupled with people’s opinions, expectations and belief in thinking they know who you are. Can increase our feeling of not being worthy. However, even though we know this, we still slip into the trap of feeling inadequate. This generally comes when we look outside of ourselves – to establish what’s required for ourselves in life.

We are not always in tune with the fact that; the secret to our self-worth is an internal dynamic – always standing guard, to what enters our minds can be challenging. But it is a habit well worth exploring and implementing in our lives. We should be setting the bar to our own heights in whichever endeavour you pursue. Do what you feel comfortable with. Do it in such a way, that it should never fall into the trap…of what is expected from anyone else.

I believe that most people are trying the best they can with the resources they have available. This unnecessary evaluation, that society holds, of what is the correct versions for us to be…can lead to, unnecessary stress and anxiety. Many people carry trauma and a variety of conditions, that are just not conducive to fitting in, with what modern day living prescribes. At some point in our lives, it is little wonder that we find ourselves asking, “why am I not worthy?”

We all have one ability and power, that has…and always will be available to all of us. It is the POWER of CHOICE. To choose how you’re going to carry the past – to choose how you’re going to react to the present – to choose what you’ll have for your future.

With us embracing CHOICE, we can start determining the lives we deserve. We can examine our own internal motivations and start to understand the deeper reasons, for you feeling that you’re not worthy.

We have the CHOICE to go and take a holistic look at our values and to see the corresponding beliefs we have about these values. We have the choice to see how our limiting beliefs are affecting our daily lives.

Let’s get real; You are worthy – you are good enough – we all are. So why exactly do we ask; “why am I not worthy?” Is it perhaps because we have determined, a meaning for what’s transpiring either within or external to ourselves? Embracing the power of CHOICE; is having the ability to search for an understanding as to why, we have determined a specific meaning, attached to opinions and situations.

Because feeling lack of worth, can be caused from both internal and external reasons, we must be acutely aware of our beliefs, our internal self-talk and the story we are living. To changing, not feel worthless – question your internal dynamic. Make sure you’re not deleting, distorting or generalising what’s happening. Too often we take one situation and blow it out of proportion, to suit our internal representation of what is real to us. There are always so many CHOICES available – we just sometimes, need to take a step back and assess the situation or opinion. Then determine a way of feeling wholesome about yourself and the situations you find yourself in.

Basically, what I’m saying here is this; firstly, our relationship with ourselves must be nurtured – we must look after our mental health to the best of our, ability. Not enough attention is paid to mental health. We have a plethora of solutions and must-do’s, when it comes to dietary and physical health. Don’t get me wrong; these are good. In my opinion – taking care of our mental health, is of supreme importance. This emotion of being worthless, does little good for mental health or self-worth. Secondly, we must be honest – with our evaluation of what is happening external to ourselves – our understanding of people’s opinions and what they THINK we are. These are based on their own internal perceptions. To be honest it’s for them to deal with. Their narrow outlook on who we are, is not our business – it’s theirs. That’s their reality – their story, which they must come to terms with. All that should matter is that you are being true to yourself. Being true to how you think and use your internal dialogue. Our energy dissipates when we waste needless energy, worrying about other opinions. Move from a place of; finding social approval to a place of self-approval. This life we lead is not a popularity contest – what it is – is you being respectful, honest and authentic to who and what you are.

There are many techniques that can and will work to change our feelings of not feeling worthy. Through Life, NLP coaching and time line therapy we allow you to breakthrough these emotions. However, the most important part of this equation is YOU. Your willingness to come to terms with where you are at and the required commitment to work through feeling worthless.

Remember to take care and be your awesome selves,

Much LOVE,

Vernon